Over the last ten years or so, I've had quite the journey personally: from exiting a marriage without having had penetrative sex, deeply addicted to pornography, to where I'm at now, where I have developed a capacity for what I call sexual athleticism, or sexual marathons. In conscious sexuality circles, it's more commonly known as non-ejaculatory sex.

But the way I've gotten here is quite different from the practices and recommendations I've seen in masculine sexuality spaces. I have developed an engineer's pathway to sexual mastery, and I write a lot about it on my Substack. My writing spans the spectrum from crass usage of language to evocative, heart-space renditions of what it means to make love. This is intentional.

Collaborate

• Other men who have made this journey, from poor sexual capacity and high sex, porn or love addiction to great containment and marathon sexual capacity. Here, I would invite honesty. This is not about boasting about what we've pulled off, but about really understanding the nature of this transition. What is it that makes such a transition possible?
• And, this might be the nerdiest way to say it out loud, a wife: someone interested in deepening with me in the realms of erotic love, who brings the kind of lens I do to sex and lovemaking, in addition to other compatibilities. Simply put, the sex explorer in me is curious to go deep with one person and see where the spiral of erotic love takes us. Here's my dating bio from Hinge.

Related writing

• 3 Principles of Making Good Sweet LoveOct 2026What every man who thinks in systems should know about sex
• Psoas Release: The Key to a Non-Ejaculatory LifeJul 2026On psoas release techniques to counter blue balls and how the Mythical King of gods got covered in a Thousand Yonis
• The Spiritual Foundations of Sexual AthleticismJun 2026Battle shame, so you can sport with each other
• An Experiment in Transferring Sexual SkillJun 2026An invitation to brothers who want freedom from compulsive lust
• Laugh As You Make LoveMar 2026On play and humor as the foundation of sexual marathons
• Forging Erotic StillnessFeb 2026Breathe up through the spine, spread out your back and release through the crown
• The Technicalities of Sexual MarathonsNov 2025Tears, fire, posture, prayer—a holistic road map for non-ejaculatory lovemaking
• Stop Polishing the Tip of Your SwordOct 2025Learn how to breathe her up — why strength, breath, and discipline matter more than tricks when it comes to sexual mastery