The mind judges. That’s what it is equipped to do. To perceive dualities & categorize into one of the dual categories it has perceived.

Judgment is often conflated with non-acceptance. So judgments get stifled. To fake acceptance. Fake acceptance is fake acceptance. It can be felt in the silent space of the stifled judgments.

Judgments can be shared. If shared, judgments should be owned. I notice that my mind is creating this judgment about you. May I share it? What’s it like to hear it?

Judgments aren’t final. Stifled judgments appear final. Because they lack the space to dynamically evolve. They occur, they get stifled. That’s the dynamic they remain stuck in.

When I have the space to express a judgment about someone, if I listen closely within, I notice the part of me that is expressing this judgment.

What’s a part? Read this–

When the urge to judge another is strong, it comes from a part that is fused with me. As I speak it out, I notice my energy, my manner of speaking that judgment, the physical action I want to do. Am I rolling my eyes? Shaking my head? Over time, I notice patterns of a certain flavor of judgment and a certain flavor of energy that accompanies its expression. The energy feels childish in a way. As if it comes from child me. Then one day, lo and behold, the part unfuses from me. I see him clearly. I see how old he is. I hear him. I hear his judgment, instead of them hearing my judgment. I feel his pain behind the judgment. I nod, empathize and hold him close to my heart. He sobs. The judgment stops. The parts of me, entrusted with stifling the part that carries the judgment, can relax.

The mind judges. The heart accepts. It is never one or the other. They always co-exist.